Our Dogma of Unity

In our modern era we define ourselves through our consumption more than what anything else. We see ourselves through what we do and what we have rather than what is underneath. We improve our bodies as another external expression of what we are, similar to the way we dress in specific outfits to showcase our belonging to certain subcultures and ingroups. We are blind without the mirror that is socialisation. Based on the reaction and perception of others, we find meaning and identity in our actions and belongings. We're becoming more and more obsessed with finding out who we are, and spend more time than ever looking anywhere but within. We are moving away from our preconceptions of what it means to be human, what it means to be a man, a woman, what boundaries exist regarding sexuality and social constructs. No longer can you say that being human means to have a set of limbs and organs without excluding those with prosthetics and artificial implants. One would not dare say a man with a pacemaker is less of a human, and one would not say a man who loses an arm is less of a man for it. We see these notions as barbaric and simple, we know better now, we are educated after all. And still we argue over matters of similarity. Upon birth we are classified as boy or girl, and our lives are already set on a path we are expected to follow. Sure, our society offers a wider birth nowadays, but we are still expected to conform, and consequently we judge those who fail to adhere to our societal rules. When a girl wants to play with cars instead of dolls, and prefers her hair cut short and practical, we are perplexed. Does she not know that she is a woman? Why doesn't she get it? Even if we allow some leniency we expect her to come around at some point and settle into her proper role. Hypocrites as we are, we allow ourselves to explore the magnitude of experiences life has to offer, in search for our identity, but only within what we regard as normal. We celebrate diversity and encourage curiosity, but we still have our walls, and no matter how vast and inclusive our conceptualisation of existence is, we still feel threatened once these walls are challenged.

In our feeble defence we often argue that change is unnatural, that it is inhuman. It is one of the oldest and most widely applicable argument in human history, for it is perfectly vague and nonsensical while still explicitly addressing the feeling of unease we encounter when our view on life is challenged. It is an argument and an emotion we curiously find in most cultures, and it is perhaps one of the few things that unifies us all. You could say it is at the root of all conflict, as overcoming any argument requires one daring to admit the possibility of seeing things differently. But as we still perceive arguments as conflicts where one must lose, we strive to be the victor, and cling to this ancient argument, and in masses we enforce it's valiance. We allow ourselves to become stagnant fools, condemning others for their way of life because we feel acknowledging it will undermine our own understanding of existence. We believe our way of life is righteous because we followed a path we were presented with, a path society encouraged, one where meaningfulness and prosperity was promised. But what is life as we know it if not a slap in the face of our ancestors? We claim we are still human, we claim our way of life is natural, but I doubt our ancestors would deem it natural to sit inside, staring at a screen all day, only to go for an hour long run in a manufactured park in the middle of a concrete jungle, before slouching on a sofa for a few hours while again staring at a glowing screen.

What separates mankind from all other beings is how we have taken control of our own evolution. We are the masters of our existence, subject to nothing but our own fears and limitations. As a society we develop more quickly than ever, and we have the power to direct this change wherever we want. The problem is, we don't want change. We want to master what is, not subject ourselves to what could be. The past is definite, it is understandable, and through understanding it we can master our present, but the future, the future is uncertain, it is daunting. We fear change because we don't know how to control it. Quite simply, we fear freedom, for freedom cannot be chained. In defining our understanding of the world, we are also excluding and condemning those who are different, those who do not fit our definition. Humanity celebrates unity, but as of today, only through conformity. If history has taught us anything, it is that humanity and diversity go hand in hand, and that the further we develop, the more diverse we get. Pretending otherwise is nothing but selfish and detrimental to our fellowship. We need to come to terms with this fear of ours, no matter how deep it is. We need to accept that the truth about life, the universe and everything, is absolute and that we have yet to fully see it. What we have are opinions, fragments of understanding. Some fragments are held by most, some by but a few. Instead of condemning those few who hold their own fragments of truth, we need to shed light on their understanding and devote ourselves to accepting their way of life, their truth, and make it our own. As a society we owe it to ourselves to accept a wider understanding of the world, specifically of matters concerning our immediate existence, like what does really manhood and womanhood entail? Can a man love a man? Can a woman love more than one man? Is marriage the only path? Can you have a second family? Can friends hold hands? Can sex be frivolous? Only by truly celebrating and accepting diversity, will we all, as one people, rejoice.

Story of my life

I love stories. To me there is no greater indulgence than to allow myself the delightment of imagining what is. In our existence we consciously and subconsciously traverse a life of opportunities, making our way through various decisions and experiences. Whether or not we develop an understanding of the forces that influence and unite us as individuals in a society, we are nonetheless subject to their effects. On a daily basis I'd find myself wondering just how someone I meet might've ended up as the person they appear to be. Based on what I see and hear, I try to imagine their story, where they came from, what beliefs they must hold to have driven them to where they are. I might ask questions that seem random, but that to me would yield a necessary piece for further figuring out how the story goes. If I see you socialising in a very engaging and friendly manner, I might ask what your family gatherings are like, how you celebrate birthdays and have family dinners. I'd imagine your story is one started in a very including and encouraging home, where the words of the young are just as important and valued as an adult's. If my story proves false, I'd simply revise and try to tell another story that might fit.

The beauty of stories is found in their endless opportunities. Strictly speaking, the number of true stories I will learn from all the people I meet is minuscule, and so I have figured that I would rather imagine their stories as interesting ones, than accept the likelihood of it being the sad expectability stereotypes would have them be. Although stereotypes sometimes seem like a busy mind's best friend, they will by default abandon the enormous pool of amazement that is opportunities. For that reason especially, I adore those willing and capable of awing me with the creation of a story so unanticipated and delightfully intricate as to make me smile. And for this reason I often find myself lost in a realm of words, ideas and fantasy. A realm of fiction.

To me, a well written story is one I find transferrable. I find a thrill in observing a predicament presented in a unique social climate involving elaborate and nuanced characters, where their specific lives has led them to hold certain beliefs that are equally understandable, yet opposites. A story of conflict always has two sides, and I have always found myself equally interested in both, no matter the parties. I might agree with one over the other, but my mind still engages in imagining the reasons one might support the opposing side. This is especially interesting because most conflicts base themselves on a lack of understanding. Anger is very much a product of confusion. When someone or something doesn't make sense, we often choose to oppose or fight it, when instead we could simply make sense of it. I am not a very angry person, for when confused, I imagine a story. In seeking the validity of my story, I often stumble across knowledge that either enriches or challenges it, either way relieving some of my confusion. In reading fiction novels, I not only entertain my quirky interests, but also invest in my pool of stories. I learn to imagine unorthodox connections, be they social, political, natural or physical. Novels are like a meta-academy for mental preparation serving to make sense of the actual world.

It shouldn't surprise you that my closest friends are likeminded individuals. I feel a natural attraction to characters who express a fondness for stories. In my inner circle I have not a simple bunch of fantasy reading outcasts, but a close group of storytelling imaginationalists. My life is enriched by their thoughts and ideas, for they pertain to it directly. As their imagined stories are explained, so are they interweaved in my understanding of the world. Together we simply try to make sense of it all.

If I could change one thing in this world, I would have people imagine more stories.

"Just be yourself" they say

What does it mean to be yourself? People always say "Be yourself" when you wonder how to act in certain circumstances. Do I have a predetermined way of being that defines me as a person, a way of being I should follow without fault, lest I risk losing myself? Is there a given pattern for me to follow? One that you all know to be me? If it is so clear to you how I should act, why can't you tell me, rather than going on saying "Be yourself" without elaborating, ever.

Superman In Superman Red Son - Best Comic Ever

You could still be you, yet way different

My guess is you've just as little an idea as me as to how I should act, and so you simply tell me to wing it, disguising it all with a common saying that hints at the fact that my natural way of being should be good enough. The problem is, when I'm with you and everyone else that I know, or any other character that I've learned to know, such as "storeowner", "police officer" or "colleague", I know how to act, or rather, I know how I enjoy acting. I know what responses I'll get in general when I act certain ways. This is the me you all know, because this is the me I know. But you wouldn't know me as the same character that "police officer" knows, and I'll be a different character still to a colleague. I wouldn't think twice about my actions in any of the circumstances, because I'd be acting as the me I know. The difference lies in you, who you are. I project the me that I want you to see, and I hide the rest. This is natural to some extent, and perhaps manipulation once used intentionally, but to me, it is as if I'm telling you the particular part of the truth I believe you would like to hear. The rest of it, especially the parts I believe you to dislike, those I leave unannounced.

Cloud Strife And Zack Fair In Final Fantasy - Best Game Ever

You tell the truths others want to hear, both for your and their sake

The thing is, our personalities are way too complex and broad-spanned to reveal all at once, hence the saying "learning to know one another". We start with the easy stuff, the safe stuff, and then we might pop some of the passionate stuff, unless we think doing so will trigger negative emotions outweighing our positive ones. Normally you wouldn't tell someone you hate football right after they've told you how excited they are to see the match that night, unless you really hate football and really feel it would be degrading of you not to reveal such a distaste. We play it safe and we play it smart, learning to know each other, bit by bit. It takes years to reveal all the bits, and it takes a great deal of interest from the other part to pick them all up and remember where to place them. Nearly nobody will ever reach that level with me, and only a handful of people will ever care enough to figure me out as completely as I have myself. And so, knowing that most people will only remember a certain few big things about me, and make a web of information that's just big enough to remember how to act around me, I focus on the sides of me that will make sure people treat me the way I want to be treated. You might not get to know all of me, but as far as I'm concerned, I'm still being myself, and it is me you're getting to know, the way I see it fit.

Tyler Durden And Himself In Fight Club - Best Movie Ever

Changing personalities like a boss

However, a problem occurs when pressed with a situation where either the character you are playing is unknown to you, or the character you are meeting is. For instance, your first visit to your first girlfriend's house, how to balance your roles as boyfriend and potential son-in-law while avoiding the role of imposer. You probably know the role of boyfriend rather well by now, even how to handle it with friends about. But you've never been a potential son-in-law, and you've never had to juggle that and your boyfriend role while feeling pressure of acting overly imposing. So, how to behave? At this moment, it seems quite stupid telling me to be myself, doesn't it? It's like answering "What should we eat?" with "Food.". That wouldn't really be helpful at all, would it? Rather than telling me to wing it, tell me of your own experience, given that you have any, or at least try to imagine the most likely possibilities with me. Lets figure out the proper play, together. Then you'd be actually helping me out.

And if we don't figure it out, I'll have to live and learn I guess, but at least you've tried to help me out, and I'd appreciate that.

How we enable ourselves

Hubble telescope - Deep Space

We learn to observe more and more of the world we inhabit, learn to overcome obstacles and to continuously improve our mental and physical capabilities. We reach a threshold where we reveal a way to drastically change our nature, and so we have enabled ourselves as the moderator of our own evolution. We set the course and the pace. If we will it, we can become superhuman, ie. we will be superior compared to today's standard of being human. Technology will allow us to embrace our potential, it will enable us. It will be unlike anything we have ever seen, because we have nowhere in nature to observe this phenomenon. This is because we are the only ones able to explore it. We are the race destined to exceed our observed potential. We reach beyond our capabilities, we always have.

When we let ourselves, life as we live it will become the old ways, like back in the old days. We have changed our daily routine more in the past hundred years than the rest of time combined. The pace of change will not abate, it will increase. We will reveal new abilities within ourselves, that will allow us to reveal new technologies and advances that will further enable new abilities and opportunities. This is the nature of our evolution. It is no longer something that controls the changes within us, evolution is now what we ourselves decide to improve. Never before have we been able to interfere with our biology, and never before have we been able to improve our biology by introducing technology and creating symbiosis between man and machine. We are on a threshold. Past it we will find a new race, one that is enlightened in the ways of science and technology, one that is capable in ways we today are unable to imagine.

Once we have reached the edges of our potential as a race, a new door will open up. We will be able to broadcast the fact that we are ready for more. That we are capable of handling anything. Only then will the rest of the universe reveal it's presence. We will not discover them, they will open their doors and invite us in, for we will finally be ready. They will have been watching us for a long time, waiting for us to be ready, just as they are waiting for several other races to close the evolutionary gap. There can be no such gap when we introduce ourselves, because that will lead to one or the other's struggle to close said gap, without the given race being ready for such a change. Evolution might be in our own hands, but a part of the process is our own ability to hold back and let ourselves become ready for it, before we embrace it. Change can come fast, but not over night. This is why they are waiting. Waiting for us to level the playing field.

Maybe there's an intergalactic betting system on which race will reach their potential first. I wonder if we're winning. Maybe getting there first shouldn't be the goal. Someone once said life isn't a destination, it's a journey. Maybe they're having bets on how interesting our journey will be. I'd like us to win that one.

Open minded

James Jean - Hive

Being open minded is not innate in me, it is something I have to work on and force out. It is rather natural to behave, act and think in a similar fashion every day, as I have general models to follow in almost any context, and because I'm both familiar with the execution of these models as well as their repercussions. Autopilot is mostly engaged, and I find that trailing along blindly generally leaves me content and filled with a common handful of experiences. But then there is this other ability that is innate; curiosity. Curiosity is one of my most rewarding traits, as it gives me the courage to master challenges, to best my fears and to overcome obstacles. Curiosity has taught me to think positively, as it has time and again proven that there are multiple ways one can go, several right answers to any riddle and a way out of almost any situation. You don't even have to know where to look, you simply have to remember that you can look for an alternative, and it will often present itself.

Curiosity lets me break out of habits and out of my own way of being. Without it, I wouldn't have tried new food, finding flavors I never knew I'd love. I wouldn't have checked out new music, finding genres I never knew could make me dance the way they do. I wouldn't have experimented with a behavioral variety towards new people, finding out how I best enjoy myself and in what company and context I feel serenity, exhilaration, annoyance, carelessness or excitement. Being curious is to me all about discovering new sides to myself and daring to embrace them, if only for a second, to know how it feels and to understand the possibility of this being a natural part of me. Truthfully, you can only have a hunch about whether or not you'll like something until you actually try it. Only then will you know if it is for you or not, and so you don't really have a choice in the matter, other than to go for it and hope for the best. Worst thing that can happen is that you have a bad experience, but even then I find it to be worth it as I can be honest in saying I know that this in particular is not for me, at least not in this given context.

Where it gets complicated is when there are other emotions in the equation, other than the fear of simply not liking the experience at hand. Getting stung on a personal level is probably the biggest qualm for most of us, and I find this to be the toughest bubble to burst with curiosity alone. Exposing a desire to befriend someone or to reveal certain emotions towards a person can be daunting at best, as it is required that the feelings are mutual for them to prosper. This is by far the most exciting form of curiosity; that which is focused on an individual. Simply because nothing ever gets more complex and interesting than the entirety of a person, and you get to discover whether this certain kind of person is a good fit for you, and maybe even understand why or why not. The problem with such curiosity is the fear of losing the opportunity to discover what this person is all about, as an aggressive or even a passive approach could turn people away. How you should go about to sate your curiosity will have to differ based on any number of factors, ranging from your given relationship, your genders, your common network and naturally, both your personalities. And then things get really complicated, seeing as you know very little about each other in the first place, so you have to figure out your possible paths and at the same time decide upon one. Social interaction has never been so challenging as when you've got something to lose.

Compared to any other form of curiosity, the situation changes instantly once another person is added to the equation. I cannot simply decide to discover what this potential relationship will hold for me, without considering the ramifications of my actions on this person's life. And what when this person is linked to me in more ways than one? The network of people connected to the situation is often complex, and so you have more factors weighing in. What if my curiosity leads to the discomfort of others than the two of us? My relationship to a person is always somewhat made up of the network of people surrounding us and our individual relationships to each part of the network. The best example of this that I can think of is probably the most common one as well: your friend's girlfriend or boyfriend is always going to be off limits. You cannot simply let your curiosity dictate your actions, because you should respect the connection both of you have to your friend. Sometimes, however, people do find each other despite these obstacles, but then they often do that at the price of losing something. In this instance, it could lead to the loss of said friend, unless he is a character somewhat out of the ordinary. The point is, the more people that are involved and the more complex their relationships are, the more I got to consider, once I'm feeling curious.

I feel that fear of being inconsiderate is one of the few legitimate reasons for denying one's curiosity, seeing as fear of rejection, failure or injury is personal and most often something you can learn to control. Focusing on letting go of my personal qualms is a good start at least, and working on it I've found that people respond with a different energy once I focus on being open minded. Good energy has surrounded me for several weeks now, and I'm starting to think that we respond with this energy automatically when met with an energy of genuine and unrestrained interest and curiosity. Curiosity will eventually bring out every part of you, thus also the best ones, and it seems it also gives you an aura that brings out the best of everyone around you. Your ability to embrace your possibilities is at least an encouragement for those around you to do the same, or at least to embrace their own curiosity.

If they dare to force it out, I believe their personality will bloom, and that they will find tranquility. My mind is as open as ever, and I'm at least feeling quite tranquil these days.
But maybe that's just me.

Warmth

Inside this head of mine, I tend to reconfigure my view on life every now and again. I mostly do this for a limited time, enabling me to understand that which I'd otherwise be blind to see. Or simply to enhance my own ability to comprehend that which I feel. Finding new ways to explain ideas is helpful in truly understanding them, and I find that a lot of answers can be found by delving within oneself, as well as a lot of questions. Lately I've been finding several questions without apparent answers. I've been wondering where to look, where to direct my intentions, how to act and what to want. Who I want to be and how I want to get there. That would pretty much be the gist of it. And so, finding only questions and none of the related answers, I add a filter, hoping it will reveal the answer I am looking for.

Try to see life as nothing but colors, shades and nuances. Every emotion, every action and everything else can be given a color, a shade, a nuance. Seeing life this way helps you define what is what, how things affects you, how people affect you, what's important to you and what's hurtful. In order to fully appreciate the benefits of seeing the world through such a filter, you must first understand your relationship to colors. Another filter might work better for you, but I myself find colors to be fitting, as I have a conscious relationship to their effects on me, and also because colors, shades and nuances can be related to several deeper meanings. Even so, colors are a lot simpler to interpret and understand than the complete complexities of life.

Tinman's Lament - Dan May

Colors are for me divided between two poles; one warm, one cold. The cold side of the spectre gives you safety in lack of exposure, tranquility in lack of exaltation and serenity in lack of disappointment. The way I see it, living a life filled with cold colors will leave you content, yet unconsciously exasperated. I want warmth, and here's why:

Warm colors give me joy.

Orange is the color of happiness. It's the color of carelessness, fun and foolishness. It is perhaps my favorite color of all, being carefree in it's entirety. Orange is never serious, it is a late night laughing at dark humor carelessly enjoyed in the company of one's closest friends, it is my euphoria. Orange is smiling for the sake of smiling, laughing without constriction and hugging for the sake of holding someone close, not caring what onlookers might think. Orange is what I want everything I feel to be based upon, how I picture my Utopia unfurled.

She Entwined - Audrey Kawasaki

Red is the deepening of Orange. It is intensity, it is lust, it is passion and it is love. Red is not careless, but neither is it careful. Red is rather reckless and hopeless, driving me to excitement and exaltation both, although forever risking the staggering drop into the deep Blue. Red brings me to the very brink of life, overwhelming all other colors. It is by far the least stable of the colors, but also the most rewarding. When I sense Red in others, it warms me to the core, spreading joy and serenity throughout my bones. I think we desperately need to improve our ability to feel and project Red in our lives here in Norway. We're a cold people, not because we lack big hearts, but because they are walled up inside layers of purple and blue; colors that limits us to jealousy, disdain and discomfort. And I don't take kindly to folks who don't take kindly around here.

Chance Meeting Forest Monsters - Andy Kehoe

Earthly colors give me purpose.

They are the deepest of the warm, the ones close to nature. Brown and Burgundy fill me with commitment of different sorts. Brown fills me with homebound affection, reminding me of my roots and that I have a caring family. Brown is my commitment to give others this feeling of safety I myself embrace. Brown is calm and trustworthy, a feeling of companionship and an invitation to familiar bonds beyond hello. Brown is the wellbeing I feel when caring for a friend or a colleague.

Burgundy is an adaptation of Red, one that holds a lot of Brown. Burgundy is safety and compassion in one. Not often do I feel the force of Burgundy protrude, but when I do, it is as overwhelming as the strongest desires I've ever felt. Burgundy can break out tears and fills me with a profound sense of living. Truly acknowledging and accepting someone outside your family takes a lot of trust. It is simply hard to fully open up to someone, and I believe most of us rarely do. Burgundy is the feeling of acceptance. Burgundy is Red without the antagonizing Blue; the intensity and love without fear of rejection or judgement. Burgundy is accepting the fact that I love a friend like my brother, and the realization that I'm not ashamed of admitting it. I guess Burgundy is my favorite color.

I strongly desire a life filled with warmth. The question is how to get out of the cold.

Back in the days we...

Seriously, gamers need to realized they've grown the fuck up.

How often do you see people judging new games arguing that it isn't like the original, which they played for years and never stopped loving? How often is a sequel compared to the original in a fair way? Had the original and the sequel been released at the same time, the sequel would undoubtedly have been superior considering graphics and technology, but lets say we focus on the feel of the game and the visual appearance it projects, rather than the mechanics and how realistic it looks. And lets say you're 15. Yep, that's right, you probably were 15 back in the days of the original game, and you probably didn't have much else going on in your life, so it was pretty much your sole purpose back then. Did you consider that when you dropped bombs on the sequel ten years later? Don't think you did, no.

The thing is, the game isn't worse than the original because you're unable to devote your entire life to it today, it's rather you that today are unable to devote your entire life to a game, because you're ten years older. Life has changed you, made you aware of what you like and what you spend time on. You have standards based on your past experiences, and you expect new entries in your life to at least live up to said standards, and preferably surpass them. The ability to keep you enticed for weeks or years is not even remotely relevant for new games, because it's quite simply impossible. The new games aren't worse than the originals, they're actually loads better in most cases. Perfection is the new standard. Perfect gameplay, perfect visual appearance, perfect characters and perfect storyline. Not always successfully perfect, but the aspiration is at least present during development.

If you find something, anything, at the age of 20 or older, that continually impresses you and keeps you entertained and delighted for several hours, or even days or weeks, you should be in awe. You should seriously be in freakin' awe of this product that continues to meet your expectations and further on surpasses them. This is a simple product that is shifting your standards to a new best and making it harder for following entries to even please you, so enjoy it while you can and give the creators due respect. You simply cannot rate a game down, saying that it was superb for two weeks, and then lost you. The game was superb for two weeks. End of story. You loved it. For two entire weeks! Maybe you didn't end up playing it for years and years, but several might, and some definitely will. You've just grown up, and so you have to face the fact that you're gonna have to buy a new game every other week if you want to keep on being amazed. Besides, it's not like any of the old favorites kept on amazing you throughout the years. It was simply you who didn't expect, nor required it to. You were content with what you had. Then you desired more. And now, more still. And a top quality new release only has about two weeks full of amazement. After that, only the content will keep at it for years.

We don't like being content, we like being amazed. But it's about time we realize we can't be forever amazed by one single phenomenon or product. Be grateful of what you can get and give due recognition and respect.

10/10 for being amazing. And that's that.

Uneducation fosters misled dedication and mass frustration

Shackle Me Not - Jeff Soto

Delving further into how life is laid down on paths to follow, a central topic is how it is natural for society to shape the general outcome of available paths for each and every individual. Your path might be unique in it's entirety, but it will most often lead you in the same general direction as everyone else. You'll wobble through life, clinging to your own perception of reality, shaped and molded by your upbringing and inherent ability to apprehend the complexities of life, and you'll bear with you this truth about life until you die. Your general and specific ideas and convictions about life and the processes therein will define how you perceive yourself, as you measure yourself by these standards. The problem with this is the fact that your self-evaluation is based on your self-insight, and your self-insight is based on your ability to compare yourself to your perception of reality, and this perception is often flawed, to put it gently.

The truth is, many children get raised to believe dangerous misconceptions. The societies they're brought up in have been shaped by past generations' lack of knowledge combined with an innate lust for explanations, thus resulting in improvised truths that befit their reality as they perceive it. This should be a natural ongoing procedure that continues to evolve as you continue to live, making you hungrier for knowledge the more of it you get. Alas, most do not have the time nor the luxury to reflect upon everything or anything they know, and so they accept that the truth they know is as good as any, and so they pass these misconceptions on to the next generation, and so on. A vicious circle has been established, and people suffer and die, caught up in it, every day.

Conrad Bizjak

Life is a riddle, sure. I just wish more people would get at solving it their own way instead of following the bad advice of their society. The thing is, a misconceived reality will lead you nowhere safe. Thinking you have to obey certain nonexistent rules to obtain certain goals that you find important because society makes them seem like worthy achievements in life, wont necessarily get you there. Obtaining said goals would probably make you happy, because happiness is a feeling based on your perception, and so you would likely feel proud and joyful for accomplishing these achievements. The problem however lies in the misconceptions of getting there. Not all goals are attainable by the means that seem most obvious. You cannot become a famous rapper simply by playing at being a gangster and hope to survive the shootouts, and you cannot win a marathon simply by starving yourself skinny. Looks can be deceiving, and lack of knowledge can be dangerous. There is never a simple answer, everything is complex. The main reason people give up their dreams is the sudden realisation that getting there will require work. Actual work. You have to educate yourself on the topic of the dream, in order to obtain it. Misinformation will lead you astray on a misdirected path that will probably lead you nowhere good. Uneducation fosters misled dedication and mass frustration. And the problem is that being too bad at something denies you the ability to accurately judge your abilities in relevance to the norm. You simply have too narrow a perception of the issue to be able to comprehend the fact that you simply suck at it. You judge yourself to be average or often a bit above average, yet you're truthfully in the bottom 15 percentage.

Apply this to anything. Driving. You think yourself good, probably as good, or even better than most other drivers out there.  Fair enough, maybe you are. Cooking. You think yourself good, or even better than most other people out there, because you know that one special recipe and them secrets your mom told you. Fair enough, maybe you are and maybe you do. The problem is, if you're thinking "yes, I probably am as good or better", but you lack the reasons as to why you are, then you are, get this, not very good at all. Embrace the fact and educate yourself. If you could be better at something, anything, why not aim for that? Why accept mediocrity, inexperience and ignorance? Why not be the best you've ever been at everything you've ever done and ever will do? We are the pinacle of evolution and still have unheard of potential. We shouldn't all reach for the stars, but we should all start looking up and out, out of our enclosed tunnels. The more you learn, the more you realize you've got left to learn, but don't let it dishearten you. Your perception of the complete amount of knowledge you comprehend is a relative number derived from your perception of knowledge left unknown. And so, the more you learn, the less you will know. Relatively. It's a god damned paradox, but it's one we'll have to live with, because ignorance might be bliss, but it sure as hell is dull and dangerous as well.

Eyes Wide Shut - Luke Chueh

Knowledge can feel like a burden to hold, a duty to share, and a privilege to obtain. You decide what knowledge means to you, and how to approach it. But I beg of you to start thinking along the lines of "What if I'm wrong? Could there be another answer? Could I be better?". You'd be amazed by the amounts of answers the world has to offer, and I guarantee that you'll be left a more tolerating and considerate person.

Put your thinking cap on.

And don't ever take it off.

Determination or Predetermination

Sensual gravity has me spinning. There was a disturbance in The Force, and now I'm reeling out towards The Beyonds. The Beyonds I once found familiar and heartening, uplifting and even fascinating. I have been located at The Center Core for a long time now, sheltered from and unaware of the possibilities of The Beyonds. It's challenging and a bit overwhelming to apprehend the vastness of opportunities, the surreal amount of paths to explore. Spinning towards several directions simultaneously, as if suddenly bestowed upon the gift of inter-dimensional travel as well as a keen sense of exploiting opportune moments. I get a feeling of being in control, yet lost to the will of the world. On edge, yet on track. Or maybe tracks.

Wrap your head around this: From the very second you're born, your life is nothing but a tangle of opportunities. The resulting you that's sitting there is the culmination of chance, the winning streak of random events throughout an eternal chain of eventualities. You just happened to be. The you that is sitting there wouldn't be the same if that one teacher in first grade had been of the opposite sex, because you would've been influenced differently, maybe minimally, though differently still, possibly just enough to affect your perspective on certain matters, later on changing the outcome of your entire life. The point of the theory is, you are who you are because you happen to walk the paths you're set upon. The related questions, however, are boundless: Do you have power over your course or is it already destined by your past experiences? Is it given that you will act a certain way in a certain situation simply because of every single tiny memory you have stored leading up to said situation? Could you react differently than you did, or is it controlled by your nature, your being? Could it be so that we are extremely hard to predict because of our elaborate patterns of behavior, yet actually predictable, once one figures out the connections between past experiences and resulting actions? If so, everything could make sense, anything could be explained, everyone would be interpretable and any sort of behavior could theoretically be abolished.

One side of me craves explanations and understanding. I have this inner drive to observe, interpret and predict behavior, even sometimes to manipulate and construct it. I find it likely for actions to be predictable and influenceable based on the person's character, which again is shaped by his or her past. Different characteristics respond to the same actions differently and even though each individual person has a unique set of memories, most end up within the boundaries of certain archetypical characteristics. By being aware of these and their given pattern of behavior, one can predict or even manipulate their actions by playing out scenarios certain ways, or by enhancing certain aspects of a scenario, such as specific feelings, words and actions. In larger settings with several characteristics involved, the task is graver, requiring one to foretell the behavior of each and every individual as well as how they affect each other. The resulting concoction of chance is immense at the very least, and I daresay most will never even fathom the concept of such trickery, and even fewer will be capable of enabling it. There does, however, seem to be a possibility for lesser minds such as myself, to enable smaller aspects of the theory. Even though I find myself aware of these workings, they still effect me equally to others, and so I presume they're in effect for everyone, no matter how bright they might be. One simply has to take the fact that the subject in question is aware of the matter into consideration, and act accordingly. It would seem there's always a rule to follow and a solution to discover.

The other side of me wants to believe that there are boundless truths being told every second. Everyone has free will and is predisposed to act accordingly. Sometimes there are no reason, there's only chaos. You stay, fate stays, you act, fate changes. Different acts, different results. It seems logic, yet it appears unprovable. The idea is old, the idea of dimensions. A seer, or an oracle if you will, has the ability to see strings through time. They're intertwined and together construct a grand design of infinite possibilities, as one string splits into several new strings every day, dictated by your choice of actions, and thus effecting other strings which again split based on new actions and other individuals' actions. The complexity of the ability should drive a man mad, as he would be able to foretell any eventuality possible for any and every being, yet find himself somewhat helpless in arranging or influencing said eventualities. The trick I reckon, would be to focus on a few given individuals, and grasp the general outlines of their path, as well as the major conjunctions. I believe we're all able to foretell certain outcomes based on actual history or imagined history. Our imagination might be the key to said power, and I like to believe that we're all but ready to enable it.

The competitive side of me likes the idea of free will and alternate dimensions. I'd thus be able to influence my own perceived reality, as I'd be able to control my own actions and life-string in this dimension; making it as I see fit, and hopefully better than the alternate paths. I would beat my other selves and beat life as if it was a game, mastering the eventualities. My goal is keeping an ace up my sleeve at all times, to be one step ahead of current events, foretelling resulting possibilities of given actions and choosing the most favored path towards my desired outcome.

The way I see it, it matters little if it's the one way or the other. I'll probably never know. All I can do is play Life as I see it, with the cards I'm dealt, and hope to be as good at it as the fates will allow me. Whether the decisions I make are mine because of my free will or because of a predetermination of the culminations of my experiences, I will be best served hoping for free will, and warily searching for signs of lack thereof.

I am back out in The Beyonds, and I will bring balance to The Force by creating a new Core Center.

How I fare you'll know next time I zone in.

Or maybe not, who knows?

See me, do you?

You get scared so bad you jump into the guy standing behind you. You did not mean to, of course, but you simply reacted without thinking, so naturally you should not be to blame if he got hurt. Or should you?

Actions can seem controlled by outer forces, alien to ones consciousness. Maybe our subconsciousness is behind it all? Does this mean that blackouts are periods of time when our true self take control, when we act in accord with our true nature; our subconsciousness?

If regarding our consciousness as what makes us human; that which grants us the ability to think, we would have to deem a state of absentmindedness, or a black out if you will, equivalent of a state of feralness, where we're reduced to act on the behest of simple instincts; like an animal.

Such an act, one without reason, is an act of purity; it is neither good nor evil. Nevertheless, we instantly deem those who act rampant and savagely evil and those who contribute to charity good, independent of whatever their intentions were. An act of said nature will most always fall in the aforementioned category in the eyes of the beholders, regardless of the circumstances, because we, the beholders, simplify the world we perceive, making it easier to process. What difference is it to us if the man who ripped that purse from the fleeing old lady and ran off was really getting his wife's purse back from the inconspicuous bag-snatcher? We see a man grabbing hold of a purse held by an old lady, hence he is a criminal.

Shallowness is the price we pay for maintaining a world with such a level of complexity as the one we live in. It is simply too much for our mind to handle, so we place what we see in boxes, and we deal with it accordingly. But when we are challenged on this matter, when the picture we put in a box doesn't fit, when it suddenly dawns on us that our preconceived idea was faulty, we wake up.

Being aware of the shallowness of others, one can quite easily create a simple disguise for oneself, something to hide behind, something to keep others from getting at the real you. This that you show, is not who you are, but who you portray yourself as. It takes a lot of guts to live in the now, and act on the behest of one's inner desires at all times, for one will always be prone to the pointy finger of others, and they will point straight at your very self. Personally I have yet to truly know another as I know myself, and I have yet to let another know me as I do. I can't imagine how wonderful it might be to have such a relationship with someone, where nothing is hidden behind disguising gestures and social norms. I find it being one of my dreams for this life of mine, to be able to trust someone with my entire self, even the darker sides usually hidden inside layers of politeness.

Thanks to Luke Chueh for his wonderful and inspirational artwork

I will shine on your parade

There is an overwhelming pressure to be as is expected, and not as a stranger to the surrounding community. We are taught not to show off, to quietly succeed in averageness, and to live together as equals. This is what is great about our society, for we lift those of less fortune up, but this is also what holds back the gifted and the willing, for they are not allowed to shine.

Live as you wish, think big, and your ideas will be fought at every turn, your ideals questioned, your way of life illuminated, so that the world can see where it casts it's shadows, and judge you for your insolence.

One who shines must cast shadow onto others, that is the idea we swear to, might it be subconsciously for most or not. Our ideal is to communally shine, but the idea undermines the ideal, as we so often fail to behold a group as a community rather than a group of individuals. We see not a joint effort to make it, we see personal goals for personal gain, and so we judge their success as a marking of our lack there of.

One who is high on life and shines his light of well being onto others does not cast a single shade. The sun is not the reason for nightfall, and it is not the reason for darkness. The sun does but one thing, and that is to keep it's fire lit. When a gloomy day is getting at you, you don't blame the sun. One who's got a fire in him should not have to guard it from those afraid of the coldness of their own life. The ones doing this shading are the ones doing the blaming. This blame game is getting old, and I'm tired of being made to feel like I owe someone an apology for getting on with my life. We don't owe each other nothing but respect, and last time I checked, that included approval of different ways of life.

Having each other's back, should not include holding each other back.

Luke Chueh - Swarm

Mad as a hatter

Perfection is the language of the mind, once one leaves reality to create. There are no boundaries, only preconceived laws one forces upon ones ideas as they manifest. We do, however, have a tendency to nurture ideas which are altered versions of the reality we perceive, where rules might be tweaked slightly, and everything in between them is exactly as we wish it. Or rather, as we dream it.

I am a dreamer, I fear not admitting it. I let myself travel into the furthest of my mind's reaches to bend reality to perfection. Perfect situations. Perfect conversations. Perfectly imperfect even, if I really feel like making the idea believable to myself. So believable, that I find it slightly too plausible.

Look up Dreamer in the dictionary and you'll

find a picture of this guy.

I find it self-explanatory that ideas have their roots in thoughts, and that most are subconsciously created. I do however believe that it is less self-explanatory, and important to note, that the ones we actively form on the behest of our dreamy thoughts are the ones driving us. These ideas are forces upon us, by ourselves, because they are so immaculately clear to us in the given moment, that we simply cannot refuse their logics, as they are often procured as we experience something of significance, which might alter our vision of the world directly in front of us.

A human is born with a free mind. Free of restrictions, free of direction, free of life as we know it, but not free of living. Living as a human demands one to act through thought, and as one is most often nurtured in a loving home by their ever so loving parents, one will adopt their mindset and way of understanding the world. If one wonders why people fight over religion, land or even honor, one has not understood the power of the ideas of man.

Amazing what one might fool oneself to believe, and then achieve.

We let our ideas control our lives. We blind ourselves by putting blocks in our mind, neglecting that which does not fit within our idea of reality. Whenever we believe, we limit our perception. Man would not be able to see all in the world, even when given omnipotency, because it is not in our nature to see more than two strides beyond the borders of our illusion of reality. The world holds too many impressions for one to grasp, and therefore one will have to delude oneself with simpler ideas of how things are in order to accept them and experience them.

What happens, though, when reality suddenly offers nothing of the expected, and simply slaps you in the face? When the idea you've grown so fond of, which you've fallen in love with, reveals itself to hold a fault too major to ignore, or too many small ones. What then, when you must reassess the validity of your own reality?

I wish I was mad. Mad as a hatter. Mad enough never to doubt my ideas. Mad enough to believe that it is reality there is something wrong with.

It would be perfect. You would be perfect.

You were perfect.

And then I woke up to reality.

Feeding your addiction

One day in the distant future, people will look back at us and frown upon our self-destructive habits.

The very idea of making someone addicted to a poison is malicious, it's unheard of, and yet it's widely accepted and even defended by a vast number of people.

Is it because we thrive in our own weakness? Do we really enjoy being addicted?

To feel the need, the endless cravings, for then to give in to it and enjoy the overwhelming relief that follows. Has it become a necessity for us to have needs we can satisfy? Our body may decay, our aura may turn toxic, yet we don't mind, because we get to satisfy it, our addiction, by giving in to it.

When things aint going your way, Coke will save your day!

Waking up, I was already pissed off from the night before, having been overwhelmed with negativity towards today, by a certain someone, as well as losing all my contacts on my phone, plus there being a bad weather forecast for today. I didn't feel like doing anything. I just sat in my room, doing nothing, nothing at all, for about half an hour. Then I decided I wasn't going to let my day get ruined by somewhat of a social handicap and some rain. After all, I did have ways of contacting those I was going to be with in the not so distant future, and one can always put on a poncho to show the rain who's baws.

Friends should be one's antidote for everything blue in the world. For me, they damn near are, and when they are not, I look elsewhere. Today they were, most likely because I allowed them to and absolutely wanted them to. I walked out the door hoping for a fresh opinion of today, and found a refreshing attitude in my best friend as we met on the train. He and I both know that knowing how to cheer oneself up is the key to cheering other people up, as good mood is very contagious! And having a very good meal with the best of friends is definitely at the very top of my cheering-oneself-up-list. And so we ate. And so there was light. That's right, the sky cleared; the rain finally admitted defeat by the not so very awe-inspiring ponchos. Win.

Theoretical versus practical approach and execution.

There is often a wide gap between knowing what to do, and being able to do it. In general, I'd say we need both the understanding of the task, as well as enough relevant experience in order to execute it properly.

Throughout our childhood we explore the world around us, observe how it works, and then make up our understanding of it. When we try to walk, we learn that falling is both a hurtful and time consuming matter, so we figure out that by balancing, we can move about more efficiently. This basic example can also show how we differ in learning from past experiences. One could understand the reason one was falling, and thus use ones knowledge to figure out alternative ways to approach the matter, finding a solution one could practice and master, in order to stop the falling. The other way to approach this is to simply try and fail, as the muscles gain some experience each time, resulting in one learning what helps and what doesn't.

It's often to see people saying they simply can't. They can't hit the ball, they can't solve the puzzle, they can't jump the rope, they can't make a cake. They simply can't, and never will be able to. I don't believe this at all. I believe it's a cheap way of saying one is either afraid or bored of the task at hand, which leads me to the next factor that plays in. Attitude.

If you're positive towards learning how to climb a tree, you're gonna soak up information and experience like a sponge and be up there in no time. Needless to say, you're gonna be stuck down on the ground forever if you're certain you've no need for this ability to climb trees what so ever.

It does take some getting used to, but it seems to me that being positive to it, and learning new things, in general, turns out to be less energy consuming that being negative to it, and not learning. Not to mention a lot more fun.

What I hate, however, is being able to understand, but still fail to act properly. I've always been good at understanding what to do as well as explaining it to others, even without being able to do it myself. Not understanding is not as annoying, because it makes it easier to leave it be. But when you know how to do it, it tears at you that you still don't manage to.

I realized it's a line one must balance, with equal amount of understanding and experience in doing, to execute new actions correctly, but humans will forever differ in their ability to gain the one or the other. Some prove themselves as excellent thinkers, able to understand, further develop and explain to others the way things work, while some appear to be naturally good at everything they try, without being fully able to explain how they do it.

To me, it seems like choosing to teach rather than to act, is to give up, if one has never been able to master the act itself. It's the easy way out, but then again, it's the easy way out, and that will be forever tempting. I struggle with the thought however, and lean more and more towards giving it just one more try. And another. And another. I can't bear the thought of giving up on something I've already figured out.

I'll probably end up teaching one day anyway.

Why rush there?

Done knew it

http://www.ign.com/videogame-villains/7.html

Scary part is, I've always played as nr 7, in all sports, all my life.

Coincidence? I think not!

Turn the tide

Why go with the flow when doing so won't take you where you want to go?

Why give in to temptation when doing so will eventually lead to misfortune?

Why procrastinate just because everyone else choose to?

Why be less than you can be?

Why be like everyone else?

When you're not.

The power within

To feel, believe and think vs to know.

Lately I've been made aware of a theory differentiating thinking and knowing, where thinking basically involves what you feel and believe, even without sufficient evidence to prove you right, and knowing being instances where discovered truths assure your beliefs. With this in mind, I was forced to ponder whether one could choose to think, instead of knowing. The answer might be an obvious yes to many, but I doubt they'd so easily manage to view the world as full of possibilities rather than facts. We all know that a punch to the face hurts, but the mind is a powerful tool, and with it one can alter this know reality. I have personally experienced a punch to the face, both as hurtful and as revitalizing. The latter one would be in a context where I expect a certain degree of physical contact, such as in sports, and I almost crave it, as I believe it proves my dedication and effort towards the sport at hand; not everyone can take a blow and continue, but I'm sure as hell gonna.

If I choose to know that the punch hurts, I will get hurt, but if I choose to believe it gives me an energy boost and invigorates me, it most likely will. The less you know it will hurt, the less it does. Just stop knowing it.

Approaching facts and knowledge as truths, possibilities or limitations of reality.

As with all other, there are several sides to this theory as well. One of the main arguments against choosing to think rather than to know is the decreased certainty and familiarity you surround yourself with. We all have our little bubble, one of which we are afraid to burst. We don't want to deal with all the possibilities that might exist outside our world's parameters, because we're quite content with our world just as it is. We chose to neglect the possibility of things being less grand than as we see them, and thus also the ability to see and thereafter strive for improvement beyond our boundaries.

Another side to it is to view the facts and knowledge as mere possibilities. That they may or may not be true, and so, you will be open to expanded truths as well as evidence to the contrary. One who possesses this view is in one way a far more flexible and versatile person than any other, as he or she neither denies the facts nor the possibilities. On the other hand, it's a very unsettled approach to the matter, as one would think a fact to be true, yet incomplete. It's hard to be at peace with defining something, and at the same time believing it to possess further feats or meaning.

"To define is to limit" - Oscar Wilde

The third angle is the most radical one, inspired by Oscar Wilde and borderline allergic to limitations of the truth, also known as definitions. Personally I see the potential this view holds towards exploring the world as it truly is, with all the different people out there with their unique experiences and views as well as n

ature's own diversity throughout the world.

"Imagination is more important than knowledge. For knowledge is limited to all we now know and understand, while imagination embraces the entire world, and all there ever will be to know and understand." - Albert Einstein

"Until the 20th century, reality was everything humans could touch, smell, see and hear. Since the initial publication of the charged electromagnetic spectrum, humans learned that what they can touch, smell, see and hear is less than one millionth of reality" - Incubus

I agree with the quotes, but must object that reality for most people, still is, not only what they can touch, smell, see and hear, but what they want to touch, smell, see and hear. We do limit ourselves and our view of that around us, though mostly to protect our own interests.

That, however, does not mean that we limit our imagination to the same degree, but no matter how dignifying it is to view everything and everyone as bearers of unlimited meaning and potential, I personally prefer the second viewpoint, as I can't help but admit that some of today's well known facts are too well researched to be inaccurate, yet quite likely incompletely defined.

I do believe that to define is to limit. But sometimes limits are good for you. You can reach for the sky as long and hard as you'd like, but you won't be able to touch it.

Religion vs Science

One of the biggest conflicts in the history of man is between believers and knowers. A lot of what I've already argued can quite directly be transferred to religious beliefs and scientific truths.

I'm not a religious man, but I can see how it would be useful being one. Even with sufficient evidence to the contrary, millions, or even billions of people still believe in their religious teachings. They might not believe all of it, but they believe that which is of benefit to believe. One cannot prove there is no life after death, so why not believe there is? Why not believe that good deeds will be rewarded and bad punished, if not in life, then at least in the afterlife? A god-fearing man is one who respects other men as his holy book instructs him to, one who acts as it reads he should. It is as I've mentioned before, if you truly believe it, it will affect your perception of reality, and ultimately your actions.

The scientific reply to this is naturally that the will you find, and the actions you perform, all have roots in your own mind. You as a person have the power to change your own beliefs and actions, and thus you are in no need of some god to instruct you. You simply chose to believe an imaginary figure to know better than you, and so you submit to his will and let yourself be guided, unaware that you're truly guiding yourself.

The problem might lie in most people not understanding that they themselves have this power. Or that they in their belief of not being able to do this on their own, actually construct a mental barrier, hindering them, until they get external guidance. My point, however, is that you never truly are guided by anything or anyone external; you let them influence you, but in the end it's you yourself who makes the decision and does the guiding.

This is why I respect people for having their religious beliefs and views, but I do wish they'd all understand that they are able to guide themselves.

Impulsive and challenging vs Organized and awaiting

I have, for most of my life, been a bit awaiting, delaying and somewhat skeptical to new ideas and suggestions, but I've been pushing myself in the opposite direction, towards the less conservative me, a me who is impulsive and challenging.

I find this new me to be intertwined with the view I now hold of the world. It would be mean to categorize, but I'm gonna do it anyway, suggesting that most conservatives are both organized, awaiting, possibly religious and certainly confident in our world's facts and knowledge.

Refusal to accept definitions of any kind and to view everything as an unending fountain of opportunity and possibility would thus be the contradiction, resulting in a person being both very impulsive and challenging as well as inventive and curious.

I would rather be the latter than the former, but I will most likely, to my best interest as well, land somewhere in the middle. Where would you place yourself?

Number one

The complexity of the world is smothering me. I find myself trying to focus on everything, all at once, thus failing to focus on anything at all. Everything I do, everywhere I go, all I produce is but a fraction of what I'd normally aim at, what my abilities should allow for. I'm born and raised a true winner, never second, undefeated. However, lately I've been treading on new grounds everywhere I go, all I embrace seems to be new to me, and suddenly I'm playing on someone else's turf. I'm no longer number one, and even though I know that's ok, it's killing me.

I've wondered long and dug deep to figure out exactly why it's so, but I never really manage to control this urge I get whenever I feel inferior to someone. It feels like I could explode, like I could wind up hurting someone close, both mentally and physically. It's a horrible feeling, and it's one I've avoided all my life, and now fail to both understand and control.

I'm ashamed of being such a poor loser, but I'm glad I at least understand the given circumstances and situations, so that I do contain myself to only explode within.

It's not like I've never lost at anything in my life, but it hasn't ever changed the way I feel or view myself. The feeling of invulnerability and superiority never faded, not even a bit. Whatever the results, I would still feel like the best, and act like the best, and often, in the end, be the best. To lose that feeling is like losing a piece of myself. It's a piece, which without, I cannot be whole, and thus one I must reacquire in order to function as I should.

Maybe it's a piece everyone needs in order to reach their potential. I certainly think one has a greater chance at being the best, if they believe they're the best. If anyone has already, or ever figures out, how to work their way around it, I'd really love a hint, because I'm growing tired of needing to be number one.